Monday Morning Stories With Mookie - Episode 46

The Time Mookie Busted Some Scumbags Stealing Car Stereos

It was late one particular evening, and I was sitting at my desk in the glorious Funke Apartments (Pronounced “Funky”) studying for my upcoming finals.  My roommate “Russ”(*) was working at Red Lobster that night, and then was going to a “gathering” after he got off work (i.e. getting drunk).  While I wished I was engaged in the activity Russ was in, I was trying to finish up the semester strong and do well on my finals.

As I was sitting there, I heard a loud car enter the parking lot outside my 2^nd floor window and could hear a variety of voices.  Our place was usually dead this time of night, so I peeked out the window to see what was going on.  Sitting under the security light in the parking lot was a junky late 80’s model white Renault Alliance.  It looked like there were four people sitting inside the running car – which I quickly noticed had no license plates.  Suddenly, two guys came bailing out of the rear doors of the car and ran around the building.  Naturally, I was curious as to what they were up to.  My suspicions were extra high because less than two-weeks prior to this, Russ' car had been broken into in the very same parking lot and his in-dash CD player and 35mm camera were stolen.

I opened the door to my apartment and ran up half a flight of stairs to a set of windows that overlooked the street out in front of the building.  Out front I saw a car that was parked along the street with its trunk lid up in the air, and I saw the two guys - who ran from the parking lot - digging in the trunk of this car.  I ran down to the front door of the building and stepped out onto the front steps, and saw that they were still there.  Unconsciously – I yelled “Hey!”  The dudes looked up, and took off running with arm-loads of something.  I ran back up to my apartment and looked out the window.  I saw the two guys jump back into the backseat of the Renault Alliance, which left very quickly and in very loud fashion.

As the recent theft from Russ’ car was still fresh in my mind, and the suspicious behavior these dudes exhibited was not “normal” for these parts, I called up the police to let them know what I saw.  A nice woman took my call and asked me about what I saw.  I told them of the recent theft from my roommate’s car, about the junky white Renault Alliance with no plates, how it appeared to have 4 guys in it, and how two of them appeared to have taken something out of the trunk of a car out front.  She asked if I was sure they took something, to which I said when they left the Renault they weren’t carrying anything, and when they went back to it - they were.  Plus they'd left the trunk lid open of the car they were digging around in.  She said OK, and then said “Please hold.”  A good two minutes went by, and I was wondering what was going on.  Finally, the woman came back on the phone and said:

“Based on your report and description, could an officer stop by your location and speak with you?” 

“Sure.” I said.

About ten minutes later there is a knock on my door, and I open it to find Officer “Mary Jo”(*) standing there.  I’m not sure if she knew who I was, but I definitely know who she is.  She just happened to be Russ’ brother’s whore of an ex-fiance.  This is way funny to me, and wish to God that Russ was here right now because that would have been FUNNY.

Officer Mary Jo quickly notices my "study attire," which is a t-shirt and boxer shorts.  She kindly asks me to get dressed and then meet her out front so she can get further information about my report.  While the boxers I was wearing were not my “underwear,” I did as I was asked and put on some regular shorts.  I walked out front to find two or three squad cars in the street, and a number of cops standing around the car that had its trunk contents pillaged.

Officer Mary Jo was talking to another officer when I was approached by a male officer who asked me “Are you the guy that called in the report?”  I said “Yes, I am.”  He says, “Could you identify the suspects if you had to?”  I said “Yeah probably.  I saw what they were wearing.”  He says “Well a unit just stopped a vehicle that matched your description about five blocks from here.  Why don’t you come with me.”

So we go out to his squad car and I get in the passenger seat.  As I buckled up, he threw on the flashers and we took off.  About 5 blocks later, we arrived at a vacant lot where the Renault Alliance was sitting amongst the glare of spotlights and flashers from (included ours) five squad cars.  My “chauffeur” then radioed to the other cops to get the suspects out so I could identify them.  Out of each of the 4 cars sitting there, one at a time an officer brought a suspect out of the back of their cruisers.  The cop I was with was shining his spotlight at the suspects so they couldn’t see me sitting in his car.  He asked me “ Can you identify them?” 

I said, “Well that guy and that guy were the ones I saw running and were in the backseat.  That guy with the hat was driving, and the guy in the red shirt must have been in the passenger seat because I saw a guy wearing a red shirt.”  The cop looks at me and says “Are you sure?”  To which, I say “Yes.  Positivley.”

The cop then grabbed his radio and said “BINGO.  The witness just correctly described the suspects as they were found.”  He then told me they found various car stereo equipment in their car, and a set of speakers that appeared to have been taken from the car I witnessed being broken into.  He took me back to my apartment, and said I was free to go.  He had me sign a document based on what I had just seen and reported, and said I may be contacted later in the future about this incident.  Then he and the officers departed as fast as they had arrived.

I went back into my apartment and my mind was just buzzing.  Did that just happen?  Then I wondered if these guys would figure out who ratted them out and come back for some revenge.  Needless to say I wasn’t too worried as my car had a crap stereo, and they didn’t know what I looked like or which apartment where I lived.

Eventually Russ came home, and couldn’t believe what I told him had happened while he was gone.  When I told him Officer Mary Jo was here, he uttered several expletives and said it was good thing he wasn’t there when she was.

A couple months went by and I didn't hear anything from the police, so I figured my services were no longer needed.  Then one day I arrived home, and Russ told me “A deputy sheriff was here looking for you.  He gave me this to give to you.”  He handed me an envelope, which I opened to find a GD summons to appear in court for a deposition regarding the incident I reported.  Shiiiiiit.  The oddest thing about it though, was that the summons was ordered by the attorney for the defendant.  So I figured they were going to try and get my witness statement thrown out on some technicality or something.  As the summons carried heavy language about being required to show up for court or face arrest, I made sure I was going to be there.  I requested off work, and showed up at the court house at the given place/time as instructed.  I checked in with some court clerk, and she told me to have a seat in a nearby chair.  So I sat down and I waited.  And I waited.  And I waited.  And I waited some more.  It was now 30 minutes past my appointed time, and I hadn’t been talked to by anyone.  Finally I went back to the clerk and asked what was going on.  She said I just had to wait.  So I went back to my chair and waited.  All of a sudden, some woman came bursting into the clerk’s office and looked quite harried.  She saw me and asked if I was here for the deposition in regards to whatever the defendant’s name was.  I said that I was.  She said “I’m sorry, it has been cancelled.”  She then turned around and walked away. 

Well F you too. 

Needless to say I was pissed.  I made sure I was here on time, I had taken time off work so I didn’t get arrested, and I sat here for 40 minutes……only to be told I wasn’t needed.  For a few minutes, it certainly made me feel like “doing the right thing” was SO not worth it.  I just got robbed of my TIME!

By the time I got home though, I had calmed down and felt good knowing I had done a good deed.  Plus I knew if I was put into the same situation again, I would totally do the same exact thing I did before.

Except I would have given Officer Mary Jo a hard time about screwing over my roommate's brother.  Because that would have been awesome.

(*) - Names changed to protect the guilty/innocent


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