Saturday, May 31, 2014


This makes my head hurt SO bad. I hope that it's a joke but you know it isn't.

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Arthur is Turnt Up

You better recognize bitch.

There Is No Doubt About Her Swag

That mullet and the Dale Earnhardt-style glasses are just icing on the cake.

Poor Wile E. Coyote


Subliminally Inappropriate

However...I approve.

This Guy Really Did Not Want To Do The Dishes

Police: Woman hit by car in argument over dishes

DES MOINES, Iowa —A Des Moines woman hospitalized after being hit by a car in her driveway Sunday said she was targeted by a man angry over her request for him to help wash dishes.
The Des Moines Register reports that the woman told investigating officers she was run over after she reminded the man to wash the dishes.
A witness told police he saw the man leave the house in the 3000 block of Woodland Avenue and the victim followed after him, asking why he was upset. The witness said the man got in his car and accelerated toward the woman, hitting her and causing her to fly into the air.
The witness said the man did not stop to check on the well-being of the woman.
An arrest warrant has been issued for the man.
Read more:

Ron Swanson Does Not Like New Things

Monday, May 26, 2014

Monday Morning Stories

I'm taking the day off due to the Memorial Day holiday.

Thank you to all the men and women who have served and are serving in our armed forces.
Your sacrifices will not be forgotten.

Monday, May 19, 2014

Your Texting Shorthand Supports The Devil

The best part is that someone believes this.

This Is Sad

The Tramp Stamp To End All Tramp Stamps

The Sound Of Metallica Music

Smoking Hot Body

The Funniest Dumb Thing You Will See All Day

Monday Morning Stories With Mookie - Episode 116

The Time Mookie Had An Awkward Conversation In The Restroom

I don't know about you, but I'm not usually one to carry on a conversation with people in the restroom. Occasionally I will say "hi" to people I know in passing, but generally I try not to do it while conducting my "business." Small chit-chat may occur, but I rarely make eye contact with the person I'm talking to because it just feels too weird. If I'm in the stall taking care of "number two," its a safe bet that I don't talk to anyone. It's just kind of a rule I have.

The other day I entered the restroom at work and proceeded to visit an open urinal. A couple of urinals down from me was what appeared to be an older gentleman. I didn't recognize him from the back as I walked in, so I didn't say "hello" or anything.

As I had consumed a couple cups of coffee that morning, my bladder had an extra pressure behind it and I let 'er go with pretty solid stream. The older guy must have overheard the sound of my stream hitting the porcelain/urinal water, because he felt the need to strike up a conversation about being able to pee efficiently. So while I was in thought about how I was going to respond to an email back at my desk, I heard the following:

"Boy I wish I could produce a stream like I could when I was younger."

It took me a second to process what the guy had just said, and I let out a humored "Oh yeah?"

He then replied with the following story:
"Yeah I was out fishing my grandson a few weeks ago, and he says "Grandpa I have to pee." So I told him there was a whole lake in front of him and to have at it. So he unzips his pants, and I kid you not - this kid lets go with a stream that I swear went 50 feet out from the bank. I was like - how can you do that? And as God as my witness, this kid had finished and zipped up before the end of his stream had hit the water."

By the time the guy had finished this story, I had finished peeing and was washing up. All I could come up with was "Wow, that kid must have really had to pee." The old guy smiled and said:
"Yep. I've never seen anything like it."

I gave him nervous laugh and a nod of the head, and left the restroom. All the way back to my desk, I was laughing to myself and thinking "Did I really just hear a story from an old guy about his super-stream-peeing grandson?"

Yep. I did.

Click HERE to see the Monday Morning Stories with Mookie catalog.

Saturday, May 17, 2014