Monday, March 12, 2012

Monday Morning Stories With Mookie - Episode 7


The Time Mookie Told The Craps Guy to “F Off,” Saw A Pit Boss Get Nervous Over $100, and Partied With The Blonde Twins

One time I was in Vegas with "Junior" (*) and we stayed at the glorious Stardust.  This old girl has since been demolished (in 2006) and I hate the people responsible for it.  They started building a monstrosity called "Echelon Place" on the site, and had to stop in 2008 due to financial issues.  So now a hardly-built metal frame sits on an empty lot of gravel.  The Stardust was a gem and a time capsule into the "Classic Vegas" days.  Anyway...this rant can wait for another day.

Junior and I set out one day during our stay, and our only agenda was drinking and gambling (in that order).  During our walk down The Strip, for some reason we found ourselves in the GAWD AWFUL Holiday Inn Boardwalk Hotel and Casino.  This place was a shithole.  I say "was" because someone did the world a favor and blew the f*cker up to build something else.  It was a terribly awful place.  We were drawn into a $3 blackjack game, and I found it quite lively for such a junky venue.  Sadly the cards did not fall right for me, and I expended $20 rather quickly.  The bright point was that Junior was holding even and the beer waitress was rather prompt.  Junior and I exploited this fact and worked it to our advantage.  She was coming around faster than Junior could put them away, but not fast enough for both of us to be drinking. Junior would order a beer and we'd time it so when she showed up, he'd give her an empty and take the new one.  Then when she left we'd give the new one to whoever needed it.  We did this for an hour and it worked like a charm. 

May 9, 2006 - A Great Day In Las Vegas History
The Day They Blew Up The Boardwalk.
Meanwhile some college kid from Penn State was at the table and was losing with tremendous flair.  Finally, he'd had enough and decided he wanted to win all of his money back.  So what did he do?  Emptied his pockets and put $100 on the table.  This got the attention of the Pit Boss immediately.  He whispered something to the dealer and then stood there as the dealer dealt out to the table.  The entire table was rooting for Mr. Penn State.  He was dealt an 18, and stood firm.  The dealer dealt out to himself and busted.  The table erupted due to the windfall for the college kid.  The Pit Boss looked angry, and walked away.  We asked the dealer what the Pit Boss said, and he said something about being fired if the kid won.  He said he was half kidding, but they didn't like people up and betting that much money.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  This is how bad this place was.  Any other casino would be like YES!  BET $100!  WE LOVE YOU.  This place was scared of action. 

This brings us to what I did next.

I am wandering this poor excuse for a casino and saw that they had this little Craps game going.  I say "little," because it was 1/2 the size of a regular Craps table and was meant for "speed" play.  Plus it was a $3 minimum table.  I like Craps, so I bought in with measly $20.  I was the only one playing, so the guy slid me the dice, and I picked them up, shook them and threw them down the table.  They bounced around, the stickman slid me the dice again, I made my bets and I threw them again.  I hit my point, and got paid.  The stickman slid me the dice and with attitude goes "This isn't a normal craps table.  Don't throw the dice across the table.  Just roll them in front of you.  Its supposed to be a speedy game." 

I give him the "WTF" look.  What is this guy's deal?  I'm the only one playing here.  What needs to be so speedy?  This is Craps.  You roll/throw the dice down the table.  That's what you do. 

So I place my bets, and throw the dice down the table.  He says again, "Don't throw the dice.  Just roll them in front of you."  So I go "WHY?  This is Craps.  You throw the dice down the table."  He comes back with "It is so the game is faster."  I reply with the logic of "I'm the only one playing."

He slides the dice to me again, and I continue my present course of dice throwing.  I hit my point, and get paid.  The stickman stops the game, and is holding the dice in front of him.  He says in a very pissy tone: "I told you not to throw the dice."

I pick up my chips, looked the stickman in the eyes and said "F*ck. Off."  I turned and walked away as he seemed astonished at my choice of words and lack of respect for his "authority."  I cashed out and Junior and I got out of that dump.
One of the Twins rocking out -
©2012 Mookie5150

Later than night, Junior and I happened through Harrah's casino, and in a bar just inside the casino entrance were two blonde twins playing piano.  They were doing a "Dueling Pianos" gig and they were GOOD.  It was about 5 minutes before closing but it was obvious these chicks put on a show.  Junior goes: "We are coming back tomorrow night."

The Dueling Piano Twins at Harrah's -
©2012 Mookie5150

So the next night Junior made sure we are there even before the show starts because he wanted to see the hot blonde twins.  He started ordering beer and it is apparent he is ready to make a night of it here.  The twins of course were fabulous, and Junior was in his heights of glory. 
The twins - Kim and Tamara Pinegar - (http://www.twinkeys.com/) rocked the bar for like 4 hours, and we of course sat there and drank the entire show.  They played requests, and the entire bar would sing along to the songs.  After about 4 beers it was just a grand time.  Needless to say, we  closed down the bar and Junior was way hammered. 

If you are familiar with Vegas, you know the distance between Harrah's and Stardust is not short (even though it looks it).  We walked clear back to the Stardust and hit bed about 3AM.  What time did we have to be up to get to the airport?  4:30AM.  Junior passed out hard while I stayed up because I knew I'd feel like hell if I went to sleep.  I felt like hell anyway, but it was worth it.

Man I love Vegas.

(*) Names changed to protect the guilty/innocent.

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